English joke story

Feeling tired from work or study, then here’s something to bring a smile on your face. All these short stories below are the best collection I’ve got from countless sources, and I’m sure they will be a real entertainment for you all, that is, if you know the meaning of the jokes.

Every morning John wakes up at six and goes out riding his horse as an exercise. One day as he was riding his horse, he saw a dog sitting along side the road. To his surprise, the dog turned to him and said, ‘Good morning, sir!’ ‘I don’t know dogs can speak!’ the man exclaimed, trying to convince himself that he must be seeing things. ‘Neither do I,’ the horse agreed.

wo friends went hiking in a jungle. As they were walking, one of them got bitten by a poisonous snake. The other man took out his cell phone and dialed the numbers to the emergency department immediately asking for help. At the other end of the line a doctor picked up the phone and said, ‘How may I help you?’ ‘Hurry, a snake bit my friend, and now he doesn’t look so good!’ The man replied, panicking. ‘Calm down, sir. First of all, I’d like you to make sure whether he’s dead.’ Then all was quiet. The doctor was waiting for the man’s reply when he heard a bang. Then the man said in a loud voice, ‘Now what?’

A deer walked into a bar and said to the bartender, ‘Give me a bottle of Angkor Beer.’ The bartender, although shocked by this, did what the deer said. When the deer finished the last drop in the bottle, he asked the bartender to charge. The bartender, thinking that deer doesn’t know anything about money, said, ‘Nine dollars, please.’ And upon receiving the money, he added, ‘You know, there aren’t many deer coming here. In fact, you’re the first one I’ve seen coming here so far.’ ‘Well, with nine dollar for a bottle of Angkor Beer, I think you won’t get many more deer coming.’

Now it was time for the literature class. No sooner that the teacher came and wrote on the board about the composition that the students had to do for the day. The subject was, ‘DESCRIBE ABOUT THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING YOU’VE EVER SEEN.’ While all the students were keeping their heads down on their work, John, one of the worst students in class, suddenly picked up his paper and went to the teacher’s desk. The teacher didn’t take much time to read his essay, ‘The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen is so beautiful that you cannot describe by any words.’

One day, John went hiking in a deep forest alone when suddenly he met a group of cannibals. There are probably ten of them. He said, ‘Oh, my god! I’m doomed!’ While he was shaking all over his body, a voice boomed out from the sky. ‘You haven’t been doomed yet, my son. See that big rock over there in front of you? Well, pick it up and hit the leader of these cannibals group at his head.’ When the god finished his words, John immediately picked up the stone in front of him like the God advised and hit the leader seriously at the head. While he was standing above the lifeless body, breathing heavily, there were even more hundreds of cannibals came surrounding him with great shock on their faces. Finally, the god said, ‘OK! Now you are doomed!’

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